He Said

Summer was a whirlwind! I can't believe all that has happened in the last month. I got married, went on a honeymoon, moved to a new city AND state, flew to Minnesota for our reception, and started a student teaching job. Right now, I am sick at home, missing my home and my family. Being married to Josh has been wonderful, and I wouldn't trade it for anything else in the world. But I didn't realize until now how hard so many changes can be. Some days I am so busy, I don't even have time to think about it. Days like today, where I am home alone, I think about it a lot.

It has been hard adjusting to a new city, a new apartment, new bed, new set of responsibilities, new climate and altitude, and a new husband. Sometime I wonder how I can ever deal with all of this. I know the only One keeping me afloat right now is God. I COULD NOT do this without him. Things also come up unexpectedly, like a family tragedy. The night Josh and I came back from Minnesota, I got a heartbreaking call from my dad. My sister-in-law's sister, Anne, died fighting wildfires in northern Idaho. A tree fell on her and killed her instantly. I had only met Anne once, at my brother and sister-in-law's wedding, but I was really upset. My sister-in-law had already lost her father several years ago from complications of sledding injury. I was heartbroken for her family and weeped for them. With so much going on around me, and so much stress coming with moving and student teaching, the bad news was the tip of the iceberg.

Several weeks later, I know things are getting better. Josh and I have had some fun and wonderful moments where we can laugh and enjoy each others company. Other moments, I don't know how to feel. I miss my family and friends. I miss familiar surroundings. I miss the comforts of being around familiar people. I miss Idaho's beauty, even though Colorado Springs is beautiful as well. I feel alone in a very big place, and I have never dealt with homesickness before. I am getting used to living here, and the other day, I thought to myself, "This could be home." That is a big step for me, to even think that.

God has been the one to see me through all of this, and I know he is using this time to draw me closer to Him and to make me stronger in my faith. Some day I wonder, "Why am I here God? This doesn't exactly feel good right now!" I know God brought Josh and I here for a reason. I know our marriage will be stronger because we have to lean on one another so much. We have to rely on one another for enduring love and support when we have no one else around us to cheer us on. I thank God for giving me such a wonderful, understanding, and caring man such as Josh. I would not have been able to move to such a new place if it wasn't for his strength and support.

There has been a song that has been keeping me going through the summer. It is called "He Said" by Group 1 Crew. It talks about humans having to go through hard times, but always remembering that God will never give us more than we can handle. He will remain by our side. He will lift us up when we fall down. I have held onto that promise these last few weeks, and I will not forget it. Listen.